Just kidding. I had a great time visiting my former cellmate Keith and his colorful (an understatement to be sure) family and friends on Thanksgiving. As usual, the holiday fare was exquisitely prepared and served. I am writing this almost a week later as I needed the time to digest the experience and the opulent turkey and ham feast.
What I like about this way of celebrating one of my favorite holidays is that it puts me into a completely different world, somewhat akin to one of my favorite mystery writers, Anne Perry, whose stories set in 19th Century England created a delightful alternative universe when I was serving my prison sentence. The first new people I met were two very pleasant and engaging women, though not lovers, they are both lesbians, and both have California's vaunted medical marijuana license, so Keith's wife's sister Janeen ("call me Lou") and her younger friend Caroline were puffing away on their very feminine pipes through most of their visit.
Almost everyone else is addicted to tobacco and crowded the small balcony to do their thing. As someone who doesn't smoke or drink, the company was convivial enough that I didn't even feel left out. I particularly enjoyed Caroline, very shy when we initially met, opening up quite a bit and telling me some of her life story. Though she doesn't wear makeup, has short cropped hair, and was in baggy hiphop clothes, this is a very stunning women who has the facial structure to be a supermodel.
One thing that was different this year from my visit last Thanksgiving was the sons of Keith playing musical chairs (or maybe I should say musical bunks?). Last year, Michael was living with Keith and Jackie, along with his sexy wife Jessica, extremely jealous and volatile, and either threatening to walk out or actually doing so every half hour, mostly because Michael was visiting his baby mama and former girlfriend Jennifer to spend some of the holiday with his young son. I'd only heard about the other son, Stephen, as he was in prison. Subsequently, Michael and Jessica did break up and Keith told me he thought it was completely over.
But here to share Thanksgiving with her young son with a former lover was Jessica, back in her marriage. As usual wearing a sexy low cut outfit (which doesn't both me at all so long as nothing falls into the gravy). She seemed a lot calmer this year, but then Michael wasn't present. He's at San Quentin. But recently paroled Stephen is now living with Keith and Jackie, along with his attractive blonde fiancee Mo and his shaved head and heavily tattooed torso. Seriously, are you following all this?
Bill, a 50ish friend of Keith's who was with us last Thanksgiving isn't any longer. He died of liver failure and other complications due to substance abuse over many years. He was a nice guy and intelligent and interesting conversationalist--just pointing out some of the tragedy of our drug culture. But if we needed a reminder of how blessed we all are to be alive and well and enjoying a full plate, Bill gave us that gift with his absence.
Lou showed off pictures of her home near the Oregon border, with massive marijuana leaves hanging to dry on the inside porch, and the plants themselves surrounding the house. She is also a champion Farmville player on Facebook and was coaching Keith, who wasn't as sociable as last year as he is now addicted to the time-consuming, time-filling game. Lou is evidently in the running to score the most points anyone ever has.
The seven of us crowded into a small two bedroom apartment, but it didn't feel cramped. What was lacking in space was made up in sheer entertainment value. I mentioned to someone how good it feels to get back to my solitary existence after such a visit and she said it must be like banging your head with a hammer and then having it feel so good when you stop. No, I replied, because there was nothing less than interesting and pleasant about my holiday companions--It's more like having an exotic and delicious ethnic meal and then returning home to your favorite grilled cheese sandwich.
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